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Some Senior Thoughts

January 30, 2012

As we get older, we look back at the problems we’ve had and consider them quite small compared to the ones that lie before us. Last June, people were wrecking their brains over the college entrance tests. It was our main concern back then… Passing. But now, we’re all experiencing a far more complicated problem…. Choosing.

Sometimes, I wonder which situation is better: having to choose the right college or not being given a choice at all. The former would entail intense contemplation and prayer while the latter would simply require you to take a leap and make the best of your circumstances. Apart from that, I also wonder… so many other things.

I wonder why we get so pressured in the first place. I wonder if it’s because we really want to get in those colleges, or if its simply because we don’t want to embarrass ourselves. One thing I noticed with my generation is how we’ve been so blinded by names. More than once, I thought about the pros of being able to say I’m from this school or that, as well as the cons of having to say such. We have very limited knowledge about the colleges and yet, we already make judgement.

There are so many things I want to do in the future. So the questions in my head were… which college would help me get there? And which course would be the most useful? A billion things were going through my mind. I was contradicting myself and consequently, confusing myself all the more. I conditioned my mind to believe that I’d be happy anywhere and that I’d make the most out of whichever course and college I’d end up in, and because of that it seemed that I had lost sight of what I truly wanted.

I have my dreams but, would that secure my future? I know what I want but, I don’t only want one thing. How can we ever be sure?

I’ve heard stories of success and failure from schools we hear about all the time, as well as schools we’d never consider. Yes, there are success stories from the unconventional colleges and yes, there are also, well, not-so-successful stories from the colleges we think of so highly. It made me realize that everything is preferential and nothing is true for all.

Sometimes, the decisions we make come as a surprise to others.
Sometimes, we make choices even we don’t expect to make.
Sometimes, our “wrong” choices turn out right.
Sometimes, the dreams we’ve placed behind us surface.
Sometimes,  our minds change.
Sometimes… things change.

Sometimes. Not all the time. 

Even if I go through the pros and cons over and over again, I’ll never be a billion percent sure of how things will turn out for me. I hate being uncertain about decisions that will really affect your life…. but, to always be sure of things? Now, that’s not fun at all. After a thousand rounds of contemplation, I came up with a pretty good conclusion.

In the end, it all boils down to what we make of ourselves. It’s not the school. It’s not the course.
If you’re determined to make it, you will.

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