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A Need for New

January 9, 2013

It’s only the second week of the year and already, I’ve started to feel… something that could be anxiety, maybe? Not sure what this is called. It’s like some supernatural thing that’s either right in front of your face or surrounding you completely. But, you can’t see it. And it’s telling you that you’re stuck. It may be to what you’re doing at the moment or where you are in life or stuck at your current skill level. Or something. Whatever. Stuck.

Out of no where, I feel it. And it’s so familiar… whenever there seems to be no progress? Vague, I know. But, it could be about several things in my life right now.

One, there’s no progress with the (architectural) plate I’m currently working on.

Well, I’m almost done. Really. However, I’ve been almost done for the past week. If it were due today like it originally was, I would have finished it last night but, I didn’t. Because the deadline was moved tomorrow. Or so I thought.

I was working on my last page earlier this evening, until I got a text that said the deadline was extended to Saturday morning. If it were due tomorrow, I would have finished it today. Really. I could have… but, I didn’t.

Shucks. That’s so bad. What’s happening to me…

We’ve been working on this project the entire semester. It’s been on my mind since then and I don’t know, maybe I kind of want to get this over with and have a new project to think about? I can’t quite figure out what I want. But, anyway…

Two, there’s no progress with either of my goals for the year: to get my driver’s license and to get Details Ink. products at a bookstore.

Okay, maybe I’m being a little too hard on myself since, it’s only the 9th day of the year and I have 356  days to get it done…

As much as I hate saying that there’s no time… okay, no. I’m not even gonna continue that sentence. SOON, I WILL MAKE TIME. For both. I gotta live out my Just Do It philosophy from last year! I should at least, start figuring out what I need to do or who I need to talk to. Mhm. Soon, I will make time.

I thought it’d be easier after I’ve done it every week for an entire year, right? But, no… I haven’t really just done anything in a while.

I didn’t do anything super NEW last week. Which was the FIRST week of 2013 so, it should have been really epic but, no… And for this week, I still haven’t done my something new and it’s already Wednesday.

Shucks. That’s so bad. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME…

I’m trying to analyze the feeling.

I know that I’ve never been a fan of routines because, well, I end up feeling like this. Sort of stuck. And kind of bored. But, for the past week, it’s been the normal, monotonous go – to – school – go – home – and – work – on – the – plate – and – then – sleep routine. Nothing that interesting in between. Not that many interesting stories to tell.

Maybe that’s what’s been killing my spirit. OR maybe I’m just running out of cool, new things that are convenient for me to do? Yeah, that could be it. BUT HOW?!?! I have an entire list of things I’ve always wanted to do! Maybe the things that were new to me before have already meshed into what’s normal for me and therefore, have lost the thrill or X – factor or whatever special thing you’d like to call what they once had. So perhaps, I have to step it up a notch and be a little more adventurous when I try things out?

Hmmmmmm.

Or I could be over – thinking right now. I could be overlooking the obvious. Actually, I could have just written a tweet instead of this entire blog… Hm.

Maybe…

I just need to do something really, really, REALLY SUPER DUPER NEW.

The question is…

Like what?!

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